perlahaha: hey baby, if it’s not too much treble, i’d really like to ‘B’ with you … naturally.
friend: *whispering* if you're stupid say "what"
friend: OH MAN
OH DEAR FUCKING CHRIST
I GOT YOU SO GOOD, THAT WAS AWESOME
SWEET, SWEET DICKS IN MY MOUTH. I HAVE NEVER LAUGHED THIS HARD. EVER.
JESUS. JESUS HELP ME.
yeahnofuckthat: did anyone else ever notice that danny phantom grew up to be chip skylark
yo, draw something
WILL YOU FUCK OFF WITH THE DIREWOLF?! your bullshit cost me my “three stars only” rule. fuck you.
What ingredients does it take to make you? →
bingonightatthestripclub: erid4nus: snuffysbox: Gonna do another because I accidentally used my url. Lea is made of copper, bananas, and determination. With a dash of new school. Mathias is made of hopes, lipstick, and partnership. With a dash of old school. Kristen is made of sticks, laughs, and happiness. With a dash of Garfield. David Mayo is made of beer, words, and shotguns. With...
Fuckass McFriendface: CISPA: Where’s The Outrage... →
abaldwin360: The Cyber Intelligence Sharing And Protection Act (CISPA), otherwise known as the bigger, and nastier brother to both the SOPA and PIPA acts that got loudly smacked down after the Internet realized just how dangerous and ill-thought out they were. The reaction to both SOPA and…
The Doctor Who Fandom and the Olympic Torch
Whovians: You know who has to carry the Olympic Torch and light up the fire?
BBC: Hey, wait a second, you kno-
Whovians: You know who has to do it
BBC: Listen, that was just an episode-
Whovians: You know who.
BBC: It's just fiction.
Whovians: You know who.
BBC: But this series is not that important as-
Whovians: You know.
Whovians: Or the world will explode
Whovians: It's time law BBC.
Whovians: It's the law of the universe.
Whovians: There will be a crack in time.
BBC: I think you take this a bit too seriou-
Whovians: The Doctor will come
BBC: But David hasn't even got time for this, we asked-
Whovians: It's written in history.
BBC: But the Queen-
Whovians: Will not be amused.
i am the reason we can't have nice things
Rando #: Hey its michelle my phone wasnt working
Me: Greetings. My name is David, and I am pleased to make your acquaintance. I fear that I may not be the intended recipient of your message, but I am nonetheless saddened to hear of your phone troubles, and glad to hear that you have found a way around them. I like a wide variety of music, televisions shows with complex and compelling characters, and movies with themes of what defines our humanity and who we are (especially stories of normal people thrust into extraordinary situations). I was born and raised in Philadelphia as a normal child. I would spend most of my time at the playground, playing basketball with the other kids. But after I got into a fight with two new guys who were up to no good, my mom got scared, and said, "you're moving in with your auntie and uncle in Bel-air." I whistled for a cab, and when it came near the license plate said "fresh" and had dice in the mirror. If anything, I could say this cab was rare, but I thought "nah, forget it, 'yo homes to Bel-air!'" Then we moved to Huntsville, which is how you texted me by mistake. (because she certainly did not text a Californian number)
Rando #: Ok whats abbys #
Me: I only know one Abby, and she lives in Hoover. (different area code)
nothing: When will Microsoft realize Bing is a... →
marththebland: When will Microsoft realize Bing is a piece of shit Google is the best search engine I’m sorry Microsoft I love you I really do but Google has you beat in search engines and I think you should just stop trying I love Windows 7 and I love the Xbox 360 you guys did a great job on those but let’s…
bingonightatthestripclub replied to your video: possibly the most important thing you could ever… IT’S COOOOOOOOL GUY. This is one of the reasons I started dating Mike hahahaha ne’er can be found a relationship with a more solid foundation.
Commander Shepard: hey I just met you
Commander Shepard: and this is crazy
Commander Shepard: but I should go
my lease just told me that the realtor is not responsible for damage caused by any act of god. dafuq
i get why these x’s have to be so fucking hard to get off, but it doesn’t make me any more accepting of the fact that i can’t get rid of them. but the food was worth it.
imganon: hunnidthousand: I tried recreating Drive by myself but I crashed into a tree Maybe you should stick to your roots and leaf the driving to the experts
marththebland: I wish I was a female tiger because then if I was talking to someone and I was getting off topic I could say “but I tigress,” and then kill and eat them because I am a tiger
CARRY ON, MY WAYWARD SONNNNNNNN
ignorantatheist: Pac came back before Jesus Atheists: 1 Christians : -9000
bingonightatthestripclub: poorlydressedhipster: zombieslutfromhell: ludicholo: kwadi: miikan: is this what guys do at sleepovers where are they coming from omg #nohomo This was not at all what I expected dying Imagine what would happen if someone walked in on them filming that. shit. they know.
queenofteamplasma: in my spanish class today a girl asked what the difference was between star wars and star trek. and then this kid stood up really fast and threw his stuff across the room and flipped his desk over and started yelling out of rage.
prof oak: are you a boy or a girl
tumblr user: how dare you ask that question you cisgender scum what if i don't fit in the gender binary why can't i use two names interchangeably what if i identify as an otherkin why are the playable characters wearing clothes that fit their gender role why can there be pokemon that don't have a gender why can't i have a ditto as a starter it's my spirit pokemon lol where are MY options i'm writing a letter to nintendo to express my frustration depsite the fact they don't actually produce the games